Cannonball Run II - 1/5

The Cannonball Run was the bastard offspring of Smokey and the Bandit. So what's a bastard offspring without a bastard sequel? Since Cannonball Run broke box office records when it was released it would only be a matter of time before a sequel followed. What amazes me though is it took three years for this shit to hit the big screen? I'm sure it took only a matter of minutes to write the script so why three years? Whatever the reason it came and quickly went.

Like I expected this film is a complete carbon copy of the original. So much in fact that people constantly get these two films confused. Which one has Telly Savalas? Which one has Roger Moore? Because the film is like a mirror reflection of the first film I apologize for any of the films faults being exactly the same of the first.

The first problem, like excepted, is too little plot. Again Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise enter the cross country race this time dressed as military officers. They pick up two nuns (one being Shirley MacLaine, no doubt referencing her character in Two Mules for Sister Sara.) You get more plot by reading the back of the box art as opposed to watching the damn film!

The second problem, again, is too many stars! The film, like the first, tries too hard to load up the film with as many aging stars as possible, most of them no doubt doing it for a paycheck (I'm looking at you Telly Savalas!). In comes the third problem: Too many pointless scenes! Because our director wants to give each star some screen time, he loads up the film with pointless sequences just to get their smiling mug on the screen.

The fourth problem is, again like the first film, it just isn't funny! I understand humor is very subjective but the humor is so dopey and stupid that only Jeff Foxworthy's most hardcore rednecks would find anything to laugh at.

Fans of aging superstars might want to see but over all this is one of the most pointless, artless films ever made. If you look up Burt Reynolds career one can see that after this film his popularity quickly falls. It's like career fell apart and audience were sick and tired of his good ol' boy characters. I sure am! What boggles my mind is he turns down Smokey and the Bandit Part 3 but in turn does crud sequels like this? I would have much more wanted to see him return as the Bandit one more time (in a full film!) as opposed to, what's this characters name again, oh yeah J.J. McClure. Believe it or not they did make a Cannonball Run III however like Smokey 3, Reynolds bowed out. The film was later retitled Speed Zone! though it still kept the Cannonball Run III title many places overseas. I just get a little sick thinking that another one of these films exists. That film however is not on DVD yet or else this reviewer would no doubt hunt it down to warn the world about Cannonball Run again!

Written By Eric Reifschneider