Blob, The (1988) - 3.5/5

30 years after the original "Blob" devoured movie goers at the drive in, the gelatinous mass of man hungry space monster was remade for a less moral and more aggressive 1980s audience. Much to my surprise, its actually a fairly solid piece of 80s horror film that blends plenty of gore, dark humor, and great special effects whilst remaining fairly true to the classic.

Meg (Smith) and Lance (Leitch) finally got it out and decided to go on a date. He's a stud receiver on the small town football team. She's a cheerleader. Should be all Mayberry here. Unfortunately, the night of their date seems to not have that in mind and a fallen meteor brings a mysterious 'blob' into their lives that has a pretty solid hunger that Wheaties can't satiate. With the help of a local rebel Flagg (Dillion), these kids might be the only ones with the balls to stop this ever-growing outer space monster, even when a suspicious government shows up to clean up the mess.

The best part about "The Blob" is that it strikes a balance between keeping it true to the original whilst updating it to fit the times. The film takes the 'alien' creature to new aggressive and violent pastures to bring it up to 80s standards (oh how I miss those standards of super violence in movies). We get substantial gore as it devours and literally breaks down its victims with its acid touch and its top notch special effects of this mass of hungry Jell-O make for an intense watch at times. Although it can be a bit cheesy, because leaping your motorcycle over the ravine to get away from government helicopters ALWAYS works, "The Blob" creates a great fun horror atmosphere that takes the story to the next level.

The film also balances itself away from the grotesque with some well placed humor here and there. Of course, even being of the dark variety, its a nice break from the chases and eating of laborers and balances the film out better.

Occasionally the film seems a bit too out there still with how the government agents are portrayed (and of course the previously mentioned motorcycle chase) and some of its more outrageous gore moments actually spark laughter. When the guy goes to cop a feel off of his date in the car and a fucking blob leaps out of her blouse, it was hard not to laugh. Which is both intentional and not, making it a bit wishy washy in the end.

"The Blob" does a solid job giving us a whole new (and now with 75% more violence!) look on a classic horror picture. It balances itself well and utilizes its strengths nicely. It does suffer a bit from unintentional logic lapses and broad stroke characters, but in the end comes off as a great 80s cult classic. 

Written By Matt Reifschneider